The Power of Words in the Bisexual Community

Words are very powerful. The right words can lead an army into war, make one fall in love, or influence an entire generation to think feel or act a certain way. Civilizations have fought wars over the words in books. They seem so simple, so innocuous—yet they hold such great sway over our lives. Our politicians employ staff whose sole purpose is to imagine the right combination of words. Be it label, diagnosis or simple political correctness, something as simple as a word can grab and hold sway over us all.

The word bisexual meaning “attracted to both sexes” is from 1914. Prior to this, the meaning of bisexual was “having both sexes in one being” this meaning having stemmed from 1824. The word itself has been the subject of much debate and at times ridicule. In fact, many within the BLGT community seem to be unclear as to what bisexuality even references. It doesn’t help matters that a new label has hit the scene—heteroflexible. This new label is defined several ways, but each definition seems to be a variation of this one:

A person who identifies themselves as primarily heterosexual but can find the same sex sexually appealing.

Whether a “heteroflexible” person is a truly bisexual person, the term in and of itself lends to further confusion. It seems to be a way for someone to still subscribe to the label of heterosexual or straight—while still involving themselves in same sex relationships. While many in the BLGT community have their own thoughts and feelings about the application of the word—it certainly seems double-sided. On the one hand, it alleviates the negative connotations that come along with any perceived homosexual relationships. On the other hand, it seems to make it easier for one to deny their true sexuality—an aid to denial, perhaps? In either case, it seems to make the case for bisexuality less severe.

This sort of “re-branding” isn’t exclusive to the BLGT community. In other parts of the world, in the realm of education it has been suggested that students should not fail, rather they should have deferred success. The argument being that a student who is told they fail may give up and drop out of school—whereas a student that is told that their success has been deferred for a semester is likely to try again.

Another case of taking what is in front of us and making it less severe. A less severe language is not necessarily a good thing. The softening of words takes away their true meaning. When a person is bisexual, it is important and defining for who they are. When a person is heteroflexible it holds less importance—reducing the definition to a more temporary condition.

When a student fails it is a serious thing. It is something that requires immediate and proper attention in order to ensure that it is given the weight it deserves. When a student has deferred success, the seriousness is whittled down into a temporary setback.

The late George Carlin talked about this softening of language in 1990. In light of the addition of heteroflexible and deferred success to our lexicon, his words seem somewhat prophetic today.

I don’t like words that hide the truth. I don’t [like] words that conceal reality. I don’t like euphemisms, or euphemistic language. I’ll give you an example of that. There’s a condition in combat. Most people know about it. It’s when a fighting person’s nervous system has been stressed to it’s absolute peak and maximum. Can’t take anymore input. The nervous system has either snapped or is about to snap. In the first world war, that condition was called shell shock. Simple, honest, direct language. Two syllables, shell shock. Almost sounds like the guns themselves. That was 70-years ago. Then a whole generation went by and the second world war came along and very same combat condition was called battle fatigue. Four syllables now. Takes a little longer to say. Doesn’t seem to hurt as much. Fatigue is a nicer word than shock. Then we had the war in Korea, 1950. Madison avenue was riding high by that time, and the very same combat condition was called operational exhaustion. Hey, were up to eight syllables now! And the humanity has been squeezed completely out of the phrase. It’s totally sterile now. Sounds like something that might happen to your car. Then of course, came the war in Vietnam, which has only been over for about sixteen or seventeen years, and I guess it’s no surprise that the very same condition was called post-traumatic stress disorder. Still eight syllables, but we’ve added a hyphen! And the pain is completely buried under jargon.

It remains to be seen if things like heteroflexibility and deferred success are concealing reality or simply adding a new layer to our colloquial language.  Time will have to tell on that.  One thing is sure—as George Carlin has pointed out – euphemistic language does seem to remove the humanity in favor of jargon.”